I usually twitter nowadays, but for some posts that i find very important in my life, i'm going to paste them up here.

"remain in me, and I will remain in you" - i must remain in His love - now now now - "so remain in My love". AMEN.
less than 20 seconds ago via web
i had a damn funny dream - i dreamt that i was selling freshly ground black pepper (as a business plan) - and I negotiated with mcdonalds.
about 1 hour ago via web
i really dislike myself - but Jesus loves me - so i will love Jesus more!!!!
about 1 hour ago via web
i will love the LORD MY GOD with all my heart. thats what i must do. with the help of GOD.

this sums up my morning - about trying to love Jesus more, because, like a prostitute who's really loved by a man, she has learnt to love that man back. and i will learn to love JESUS more, even if my heart shall break. and when my heart breaks i will go to the LORD for forgiveness, and then i will try again.
must not end.

by the grace of GOD who is helping me.

Thank GOD for "anointing my head with oil" again, that I may enjoy music again, and enjoy life, and enjoy love, and write and create music again. Which is amazing. Gone, perhaps, are the bad days.
For He anoints my head with oil, and will do it again and again.

yay.

Gotta break through!

cannot let your mood be detracted by what people think of you - or what you think you should be - like if your parents are angry at you and disappointed it doesn't mean you gotta be like, sad, all the time, or chastise yourself!

as the song says

"girl PUT YOUR RECORDS ON, Play me your favourite song, JUST GO AHEAD LET YOUR HAIR DOWN / sapphire and faded jeans, i hope you get your dreams, just go ahead let your hair down"!

yah sometimes u gotta be happy even if the rest of the world don't want you to be - because they're sad. but hey, you're not them!

i realise i dont blog enough coz now i have twitter, i have fb, but blogging is realy when you want to express something of yourself. I mean, im not perfect, and part of me is thinking this is damn stupid why the hell am I writing this and not studying and it's useless because it's not going to change my life - after i post this ill go ahead back and be the damn old schoolboy i was, is, and hopefully will stop being but knowing that i will still be, like that.

It's very sians and only GOD can slowly change me which He is doing as I pray to Him and enjoy His love and His presence and His comfort and joy and assurance and all those wonderful things and rest in His love - and Him willing slowly submit myself to Him - submit my body - which has been ravaged - to Him and let him slowly change me. as I remain in Him.

the lesson is still clear. "remain in Me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself, IT MUST REMAIN IN THE VINE".
I must remain in CHRIST always. and i believe, for He has said so, that He is going to be with me, He is going to be faithful, He will be with me "for the rest of my life" (his words, not mine).
and it will happen, i believe. i will look back and notice his hand in my life, even though, well, my physical body is weak and i'm undergoing a milion and one infirmities. but ultimately, salvation for my soul is real.

i notice that every post goes back to GOD but then that's the only hope.

I just had a really really meaningful conversation with E, P, W, G, and M - which was really nice. talking about God, Jesus, spiritual warfare, battles, sin, love, and everything under the sun. it is really refreshing when you can talk about these things that are really dear to your heart. yes, even over some beers and some teh-pings, even with law school people, you can be true to yourself. i blog about this because i just want to remember it. its nice when you can talk to people about everything, like how 'feelers' like me function, or behave, because honestly very few understand me. but its nice when some do. but it was just meaningful - i felt that it had meaning and it was good. and we should have really have more of this. instead of the senseless boys nights out.

and speaking of this i had the most amazing experience walking towards home when i wanted Jesus to be in the centre of everything good in my life - of everything beautiful in my life - and He walked with me, and made things beautiful - the songs and music (s,a) were beautiful again as He walked with me - like He made them beautiful - and He said he will be with me, all the days of my life, even after the music and the songs are gone, for they cannot be playing forever. and that is so touching and beautiful. praise God.

when the psalmist says "one day in the house of the LORD is better than a million elsewhere", sometimes i am like, wth, but sometimes really i understand its truth.

I have to be humble.
this is the start of something exciting, i think, being involved in a few projects of music, maybe finally getting a chance to have songs published; but then, this is the important thing, when you are well fed, and have success, DO NOT FORGET THE LORD YOUR GOD WHO gave you these things - like the israelites - and you are to "BLESS THE LORD YOUR GOD FOR THE GOOD LAND".
there's a verse on this;
Deuteronomy says:
When you have eaten and are satisfied, you shall bless the LORD your God for the good land which He has given you. 11 "Beware that you do not forget the LORD your God by not keeping His commandments and His ordinances and His statutes which I am commanding you today ; 12 otherwise, when you have eaten and are satisfied, and have built good houses and lived in them, 13 and when your herds and your flocks multiply, and your silver and gold multiply, and all that you have multiplies, 14 then your heart will become proud and you will forget the LORD your God who brought you out from the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery."
it's the same now, as it is in the past; - our hearts are full of pride. the bible says "the heart is deceitful above all else". and it truly is. my heart wants to boast in my own achievements, to the world to everyone, even to God, even - this is not me, its not that i weanna do it, but it's just a horrible sin of my life; so i have to obey the lord here - so that my heart will not be proud. and what is this? to PRAISE him to bless HIM. to WORSHIP HIM. so that everything will be kept in perspective - yeah, you may be successful, you may have nice cars, may have success, but it's all from Him, and what is this earthly success compared to the greatness that is in GOD? the greatness that is GOD, his infinite love and mercy and power?

I haven't been updating much but just thought this is a good platform to talk - the trick is not to let your success or talents get to your head- it robs you of your humanity.
One must be humble, yes, humble,
For it is the lord who works even though I don't feel that he is the one working and it's me - but it's still him and I must be reminded of that in my mind.

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if i were the evil one, the way i would stop christians growing is to stop them from reading the bible, the Word of God. i would trick them into using their feelings to discern God, or something; well, while we are not totally intellectual beings devoid of feeling, the feelings must be based on the word of God, for it is extremely easy to think of things that aren't there, or easy to feel. the Word of God says that "The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked (Jeremiah 17:9)" - and it is so easy to be lead astray by all sorts of thoughts.

i prayed to the Lord last night, and i was reminded that even the Lord didn't use his own logic to fight the devil, when he was tempted; nor did he use his own reasoning to go against what others say, he just quoted the word of God, and of course was so familiar with it.

Putting the helmet of salvation is very difficult.
my mind is plagued by the devil.
this is his way of making me useless for GOD by making me worried about my salvation all the time.

but Jesus tells me to put the helmet on, and i must. i must trust.
i will keep praying to the LORD for his strength to help me trust Him and his promises, simply to take Him at his word.

thanks aunty yh for sharing; really appreciated that.
now it's remembering.
it's easy to forget, especially when life is against you.
or when you are in the doldrums of your life.

Putting the helmet of salvation is very difficult.
my mind is plagued by the devil.
this is his way of making me useless for GOD by making me worried about my salvation all the time.

but Jesus tells me to put the helmet on, and i must. i must trust.
i will keep praying to the LORD for his strength to help me trust Him and his promises, simply to take Him at his word.

thanks aunty yh for sharing; really appreciated that.
now it's remembering.
it's easy to forget, especially when life is against you.
or when you are in the doldrums of your life.

How to play pop piano (properly)

[the author of this article, which is me, of course, used to play pop piano in the civil defence band, and in church bands and outside bands. he writes songs which can be found at www.myspace.com/shawnpoon and recently wrote a musical.]

It seems a bit pretentious to be writing an article about, this funny queer topic of, how to play pop piano. Simply because plenty has been written on it, and I don't pretend to be an expert in it although I do believe myself capable of playing quite reasonably well. So here's some things i feel happy to pass on to you, my readers, in the hope that you may discover the joy of playing pop piano well.

its the chords, silly!
Unlike classical music, most of the time you are given chords to accompany a song, which probably states something like C, F, Bm, Em, blah blah, and sometimes you get the occassional Absus4 or a Em7b5.....and so, you're supposed to play the chord along with the melody, when your'e playing pop piano, that's what we all know. but how do we do it?

1. Decide whether you want to play the melody with it, or not.
Usually, when you accompany a singer, you often don't want to play the melody, because you'd be doubling up with what she is doing, and then you're occupying the same frequency, and then people cannot really hear the purity of her voice/melodic line without your noisy piano accompaniment playing the same thing. so, if you're playing with a singer, don't double the melody line (ie dont play the melody line). play a chord variation in the right hand instead. when you're playing solo, however, without a singer, then of course you play the melody. but you don't have to play ONLY the melody in the right hand - what i mean is, let's say a song like "don't look back in anger" and the chorus goes "so sally can wait" - which is G - F- G - F - E .....with a C chord moving to g; you don't want to just paly that G F G F E on the right hand with a C chord moving to G on the left hand because it'll sound really empty for a chorus, so you want to texturise it by playing a chord (LH) C - G (RH) C-E-G (with the melody being the highest most note of the chord), and then moving down to (in the right hand: B/D/F- B/D/G - B/D/F - C/E (change chord to Am)) - in the way you get some texturre in the right hand also.

And usually when playing the melody, it's often palyed louder than the rest of the accompaniment; so when you are playing the melody make it louder;

2. Decide on the accompaniment style
There are many ways of playing chords, such as:
a) broken chords (ie arpeggios)
b) chordal , block chords
e) a mixture of both
d) right hand chordal, left hand broken chords...
and so how do you decide?
well, it's all about the song.
think about it - do you want the song to have long, flowy accompaniments, or do you want it stately? for example, a song like "your song" (elton john) will have quite an arpeggio-like accompaniment because it is a rather flowy piece - whereas a hymn would have stately block chords. it often depends on whether you want to accentutate the beat - whether you want the strong to have a strong beat or not - whether you want it stately, or you want it flowing. if you want it flowing, then play more broken chords, arpeggioes, to make it seem like the sense of time is elastic and, that, it diminishes the 'count' of the beat since every beat is divided into so much more; if you want it stately, however, play the chords at regular intervals, on the beat. jay chou for example is a good example, since his songs such as 'feng' or 'an jing' all have right hand chords that are played on the beat for the stately effect.

3. Decide on the rhythmic accents/emphasis
this is relevant in R n B songs for example: sometimes weird accents accentuated with a chord adds to the excitement of playing an R n b song on the piano. for example, jason derulo's "whatcha say" has much syncopation - if you hear the song, the drums are very syncopated and irregular - and a good piano player will be able to recapture the irregular syncopations of the song by mimiking the drums on the piano, by playing, for example: boom, cha, - boom - cha - cha - cha.....(how to explain rhythms, oh well) - it's really about mimiking the drums, and the beatboxes, for example, with a piano.
if it's jazz, for example, then there are the different accents as well: one example is chick corea's spain - where there are leading beats (accents before the main beats) - syncopations, etc. basically, feel the beat, and move your hands with the beat and you'll be fine.

4. Decide on the chord voicings.
chord voicings are very numerous: often when its a major chord, you have the choice of playing (1-5) with the left hand or (1-3) or (1-3-5), and the right hand will fill up the gaps, usually maybe with (1-3), or (1-5), or (3-5).... and the choice often depends on what the song needs. for example, jay chou's feng starts off with a (5-1) on the right hand, x 4, for the first chord, before it changes to a (1-5) on the dominant chord for the next 4 beats.
to put it simply:
Feng (C)
C | G | F | C| F|.....
thats the verse right...
so hows the chords played:
its something like:
on the C chord it's
(Left hand) C - E -G ; right hand is playing G-C (c being the highest note)
before moving on on the G chord to:
(left hand) B - D - G; right hand is playing (G - D) (d being the highest note)...
and moving on to the F:
(left hand) A - C - F; right hand is playing (F - C) (c being the highest note)...

but either way the entire notes make up the chord; but you could have so easily voiced it so many different ways. you could have simply voiced it:
C - E - G: right hand playing C - E, with e BEING the highest...
or so on.
so really it's a matter of preference; but usually the trick is the song. it is supposed to fit the song, so if the melody line is: C C C C G C D D D D E D G (that is feng, btw): then jay chou's instincts is to play the c as the highest, since the c note forms the melody line; and in the next chord, it's to play the d as the highest note. so most of the time the song will determine the voicings, but of course, creative freedom allows us to play anything so long as it sounds good. so try what fits! one of the tricks, though, is not to have too much movement between chords, since, it's nice if the notes flow to each other nicely, as though the piano was a choir, and it's nice if the voices move smoothly from one to another rather than jumping all over the place.

5. It's about the touch
the touch is very important: most amateurs play all the notes the same way, but then there are many things you can do to a piano. while unlike a guitar/violin - ie you dont control the strings, you can do a few things: control the timing of the note, the loudness of the note, and the quickness/fullness that you hit the note. so, follow the melody line, make the melody line sing. most of the time, a singer will not sing all the notes in the same volume, so vary your piano playing the way the singer will vary the loudness/softness of the melodic line. and another trick is to use little 'slurs', which are little piano "pull-offs", ie one note is quickly transferred to another note to give the impresion that that note is leaning to the other note.
another trick is to play the notes together, one at a time, but leaving the last note on as the next note hits the keys - so you get a little blurring effect. (of course, just a bit is good).
sometimes you want the gentle touch for a gentle song, so try to smoothly feel your way into the keys for that effect.


That's all for now. i'll write more when i think of more things.
thanks!

Treat girls with the utmost respect - that is the ac way man

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today i was really struggling, really struggling. ocd ocd ocd. just one step away from the bad thought that will kill all come to me - just one bad thought away. or even half.

so i prayed: "Lord Jesus, deliver me", or something to that extent. it was somethiing like "Lord Jesus help me". and i knew he was listening. and after that something wonderful happened - the Lord told me that He will work, i just have to put my helmet of salvation on and He will take care of the rest. and i felt like He was arranging the heavens and my mind to be alright, something was changing.

so praise GOD.
i am here today because of Him and Him alone because everything good is from Him.
and it doesn't change.

amen to that.
may i be a testimony.

like paul says, "not that i have already achieved this, but i press on"...
but it is not my own work, it is his work.
"it is GOD who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. ..."

Congratulations on Gerald and Adele for getting married! It was a lovely lovely wedding, full of God's love, perfect everlasting love between the two of them that will endure. They chose "love always preserves, always hopes, always perseveres...." (1 Corinthians) - i don't know the exact reference - but that was very apt.
it was just so sweet, i was dying inside. really. happy for them. It's great.


On another note, i drove to tampines, gave my friend a lift; everytime i drive down Simei Avenue into tampines i still feel an immense sense of nostalgia. That was my home, my little village - my kampung. it's still my home, of sorts - I think a part of me still hasn't moved out yet.
I remember, vaguely enough, the school bus rides. Which were the funnest things. Playing with kids. Playing soccer at the void deck below block 122, or wherever they used to play soccer.

Before I grew up all cold, intellectual, and materialistic, I was a kampung boy, deep down inside. I still am, perhaps. The happiest memories as a child.

Prayer meeting yesterday was great - it was awesome to be still and to meet GOD.
may i continue to grow in the Lord to find Him that perfect Being more

I'm back to the fold with the Lord Jesus being always with me - and I believe that Jesus is with me right now, and will remain with me for the rest of my life. And Jesus whispered to me that He will be with me all the days of my life - and I'm happy and joyful - and I will try my best to BELIEVE. Coz He said it, so it is true.

I'm slowly finding my way back to God again. It's been a tired road, long difficult road, but i know the Lord will bring me back slowly but surely. There is always a disconnect between my sunday life and the weekly interactions with the world but God willing I will be more faithful to Him through the week

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THis is really beyond me.
Everytime I talk to a girl, let's say, "how are you", it doesn't mean I'm trying to buaya you okay - i don't buaya every girl on the street. Thank you very much. It's presumptuous to think that I'm trying to buaya you. Presumptuous, because, firstly, as Paul Gilbert wrote, there are 6 billion people on this planet. I'm not a loaded gun, or a hired gun. Thank you very much.

Seriosuly everyone is trying to second guess me and I'M REALLY VERY IRRITATED - just treat me like a normal person thank you!

how about a song that goes
gimme sympathy

how about standing in someone else's shoes and walking around in it?

michael card who gave a sermon at my church said it's because we conveniently give people labels - instead of trying to get to know the person better.
"Oh, he's a sick man". "Oh, he's this" "Oh he's that".
so here are the categories:

if he's athletic and looks not so bright, he's classified as:
=> stupid, can't think for himself, simple minded.
if he's fat - oh he must be lazy. coz he can't exercise, or doesn't want to.
if he's wearing specs and is a bit of a nerd - oh, he's bad with members of the opposite sex. since he CANNOT possibly have any experience or skills.

we all are guilty of that, aren't we?
and until we sit down and start knowing that other person better, and see each person individually, not as a member of a class, we're never going to be able to form real relationships. it will always be, unfortunately, plastic.

Luke 6:27 - love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. do to others as you would have them do to you.
V32: if you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expectingto get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the most high, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.
Am I willing to love my enemies? To love the unlovable, to love those the world considers unlovable? But god considers them lovable so do I follow God or the world?


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Preview:
Spain v Holland - World Cup Final 2010

Here's my analysis/predictions for the final. While I'm not Paul the Octopus, who has wagered that spain will triumph, here's just an analysis from a soccer fan and lover of the game.

First up, it is fair to say that Spain's "tiki-taka" approach to football, ie playing short passes, triangles, passing and moving - a style developed from barca, will ensure that they retain most of the ball. And in Xavi Hernandez, they have probably the best passer on the planet right now - his awareness, accuracy, and most importantly decision making is always spot on. In fact, the number of times he's lost the ball, I think, can be counted with 1 hand (2 were against germany, i think). He is always available for that short option backwards when there's little space, to recycle the ball, spread it wide, hit the through pass, or play little triangles with members of his midfield three. And his first touch is so good (he always uses his body quite perfectly well as a shield) that it is impossible to get the ball off him, since he'd just turn and play a pass. And because all the Spanish players are able to retain possession of the ball very well, it means that there are almost numerous options for ball-recycling. Xabi Alonso is probably the perfect foil for Xavi since he plays deeper, and can be trusted to send raking balls to the flanks (esp to ramos) - it means that, shortwise or longwise, there is always a passing option.

However, possession without penetration only leads to, well, sad to say, arsenal. Lots of possession without any penetration, any danger. Sure, xavi can keep passing around the center circle, but no one scores goals from there. the attack has to advance. And so it is up to the likes of villa, iniesta, pedro (if he plays) to make things happen - and the Dutch have been rather stingy in defence, to be able to close up the space in between the defence and the midfield (by employing the 2 holding midfielders in de jong and van bommel) very well, with these 2 midfielders really snapping at every ball, working diligently and tirelessly, to break up the play. and if xavi et al can't find the passes forward, the ball is left to recycle. so it's really a test of mental strength - can the dutch in fact keep concentration in closing down space and restricting passing options for a whole 90 minutes? I'm not so sure about that - I think with de jong back things will be much better than against uruguay, but I'm not so sure either about spains' abiility to attack in a manner that brazil did against holland in the first half of that quarter final, with robinho, maicon, kaka, all running at pace at a slow back 4. iniesta is no slouch but definitely not as fast as robinho. xavi is pretty slow. villa, well, he's fast but he's just one man.

On the other front though, i'm not sure whether the dutch can even retain enough possession to fashion enough chances. spain, in my money's opinion, will cut off all angles to robben to prevent the simple pass to him which will result in his running at a spanish defender, whether ramos or capdevilia. i'm pretty sure that busquets will go and cover the flanks to prevent that one-on-one situation, which leaves space for sniejder etc to do some magic. but robben is a game changer - if he is up to his electrifying best, i can see the game going holland's way, because it will take some stopping, to bring him down - maybe 3 men or more, since he's so technically gifted, skilful, and fast at the same time. kuyt on the other flank gives holland some good options since he's always tirelessly running,making angles for a pass, and so on. and van persie well holds up play pretty well and is a pretty good linkman and has some skills and a good shot to boot. but with the spanish team always pressing, closing down the space, and preventing the other team from playing, it's going to be hard for a holland team to find passing channels and create chances, or even finding a teammate, since the spanish defend collectively to cover all passing lanes, not just the most dangerous ones.

On the other hand, i believe the dutch are technically more gifted than the germans. sneidjer has a better first touch than ozil, has 2 good feet, and van persie has likewise better control than klose, although he fails in the heading department. robben is faster than trochowski, which means that the full backs will not be able to push up that much.

Overall i could see spain sneaking it by 1 goal - my head says spain though my heart says holland. i can see that upset coming, that no one really expected. but it will take a great individual performance by one of holland's attacking stars to do so, whereas spain is less reliant on individual magic.

Must learn how to unthink - if I could just freeze those thoughts in my mind, how wonderful that will be. Need to learn how to think of nothing.


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