I just have to thank my Lord for getting me out of this funk. I really have to thank God....I'm just so grateful. All the time I've been relying on my own strength, being really really stressed in the mugging, worrying about, you know, what if I screw up, and stuff. and then a thought just struck me, it's really not about my own strength, but about God's strength. I turned to God, and suddenly the pressure's been lifted: i realise there's more to life than just exams. I realised that God can do immeasurably more than you ask for.
I wrote a song about it, I was just so thankful and so happy. it was like a burden lifting over my shoulders, the cloud disappearing from the horizon. Now, I don't have to worry. I just have to trust. He never failed me, He never will. Somehow He has a plan, and I know that, and all I have to do is trust.
Now I can smile again, and have the confidence to live my life the happy way, the GOd way. The happy way. Everything becomes nice. My life is complete. I just wnat to jump for joy and shout!
He will carry you through...
The song goes something like this
FOREVER TRUSTING
Music and lyrics by Shawn Poon
When I feel so alone
Trying to make it on my own
How could I forget Your mercy?
How could I forget Your love?
(another verse)
So I turn to You
Draw me near to You
Let me find some refuge in Your love
1st chorus:
Forever trusting
In Your power
Forever trusting
In Your love
Forever trusting
In Your grace
My rock and my redeemer
I surrender
2nd chorus:
Forever trusting in You
Forever trusting in You
Forever trusting in You
My rock and my redeemer, I surrender
Bridge:
And when we reach the end of our journey
And run the race to the end
It's only You that made all things happen
Without You I can do nothing
Tuesday, October 28, 2003
Monday, October 27, 2003
It is good to be intellectual. I feel it every time we are in Raffles Junior College, talking to people about work, discussing, arguing. i'm fairly certain that only iN RJC can u really do that with ease, without people thinking that you're just an act-smartie pants. okay the downside is that you get competitive, but if you want to stretch your brains and actually make use of them, RJC is perfect.
come to think of it, i acutally enjoy RJC. i acutally enjoy not having to make all those moral decisions that often plague me in ACS, those dilemmas about, well, should i join in the bullying, should i join in the bitching...and all that. here there's not much of it, coz most people are pretty nice. and even if there is nothing much comes out of it, you dont' get the beating-up of people that you get elsewhere. it seems that most of the RJC people, even though some might be boring, have a good heart inside, and aren't screwed up in their lives some way or the other. in ACS you get people who have bruised egos, bloated egos, whatnot, and it's just so difficult to be normal and nice to each other coz you are always thinking, what would people think of you? what would you say? ehhh and all that jazz. but here you can be who you are. everyone respects everyone else, and that's just the way it should be.
and besides, you can stretch your brains.
i am all for the idea that religion should be kept seperate from the state/school. in ACS religion does help in fostering a common spirit, a bond, good friends, and all that, but it leaves people with no freedom to choose for themselves whether they want to believe or not, which i feel is an essential freedom of choice everyone must make, in order so that those who truly believe are true followers, rather than being compelled to follow. so you don't get people who are so disillusioned by the constant preaching that they turn their backs on Christianity totally. you have to entice them, and the way to entice them is not to bore them or to preach to them (in that kind of preaching-style way), but to live for them. and unfortunately many of us just can't live up to those lofty standards we aim for.
and anywae i'm relaly pissed at all the medics in CMPB. they're just so irritating. i hate NS. i tink i'll hate it. i just hate the regimentation and the hierarchy and all that. you go in there, you wonder, what do you call him? SIR? Doctor? what?? and you go there, and you just follow the instructions, and the medical officers there all look down on you as though you're some kinda nut coz you're from RJC and you can't breathe out, and you can't even tie your pants (it just couldnt' come into a loop) and i was just shell-shocked i couldn't talk, or be anything but stoned. just follow instructions. dumbing down. NS makes you all like robots, like muscular robots.
come to think of it, i acutally enjoy RJC. i acutally enjoy not having to make all those moral decisions that often plague me in ACS, those dilemmas about, well, should i join in the bullying, should i join in the bitching...and all that. here there's not much of it, coz most people are pretty nice. and even if there is nothing much comes out of it, you dont' get the beating-up of people that you get elsewhere. it seems that most of the RJC people, even though some might be boring, have a good heart inside, and aren't screwed up in their lives some way or the other. in ACS you get people who have bruised egos, bloated egos, whatnot, and it's just so difficult to be normal and nice to each other coz you are always thinking, what would people think of you? what would you say? ehhh and all that jazz. but here you can be who you are. everyone respects everyone else, and that's just the way it should be.
and besides, you can stretch your brains.
i am all for the idea that religion should be kept seperate from the state/school. in ACS religion does help in fostering a common spirit, a bond, good friends, and all that, but it leaves people with no freedom to choose for themselves whether they want to believe or not, which i feel is an essential freedom of choice everyone must make, in order so that those who truly believe are true followers, rather than being compelled to follow. so you don't get people who are so disillusioned by the constant preaching that they turn their backs on Christianity totally. you have to entice them, and the way to entice them is not to bore them or to preach to them (in that kind of preaching-style way), but to live for them. and unfortunately many of us just can't live up to those lofty standards we aim for.
and anywae i'm relaly pissed at all the medics in CMPB. they're just so irritating. i hate NS. i tink i'll hate it. i just hate the regimentation and the hierarchy and all that. you go in there, you wonder, what do you call him? SIR? Doctor? what?? and you go there, and you just follow the instructions, and the medical officers there all look down on you as though you're some kinda nut coz you're from RJC and you can't breathe out, and you can't even tie your pants (it just couldnt' come into a loop) and i was just shell-shocked i couldn't talk, or be anything but stoned. just follow instructions. dumbing down. NS makes you all like robots, like muscular robots.