Spent life playing footie at the ACS(I) indoor court, and it was great stuff, save for some rugby coach who kept bugging us. Scored loads of goals, i think it was a hat trick, dont' remember, provided some, our offence kept it nice, fluent, sweet, and loads of goals, it was 10-3, but ah well it was quite an uneven matchup so it was a nice stroll in the park i guess?? The great thing about the indoor court is that the ball's extremely predictable, you can put spin on it, and dribble with spin, and all that, so it's much better than the stupid grass/sand patch that we call a field back in RJC. As i strolled out to the ac field it was all green grass, and that speaks volumes about the difference in our budget. The difference was more evident later on in the lounge, where there were 2 big billiard tables donated by old boys, presumably, and a pool table, by some Mr/Mrs tan or something, whereas back in RJ when the administration decided to ask all the 4-a-students to buy a seat for the gala dinner, there were just, zero responses. How sad is that? Perhaps AC guys are more loyal anyway, it's just something about the school.
Pool was quite fun and billiards was alright, the second game was nice at least i passed the 30-score mark, haha.
Am real shacked now, and real shocked Man U thrashed newcy 6-2. What a mess of a defence

Jamming was exhilarating, just like jumping up the ceiling, yeah!

The Hours struck me with its poignant, thoughtful storyline: it made me do one think movies haven't been able to do: think. The connections, the emotionally disturbed minds of the 3 females in the movie, and above all, the brilliant acting, especially from Julianne Moore and Kidman. It made me cry out so much since suicide is such a disturbing memory, and how does one banish the fear of doing something crazy with your life that you might regret? I'm so sorry for Leslie Cheung, and all the rest of it, for it is pure depression that haunts you and drives you there. Yet the movie ends of nicely: 'to stare life in the face' or something like that, which is a nice thing to take away from the cinema. Philip Glass's soundtrack was very nicely done, his repetitive style heightening the atmosphere and tension and the whole idea of being in confusion, in depression, nicely elucidated through the chord progressions that never seem to resolve, the repetitions that show the human struggle, and the movement of speed in the music. In the end why did Richard have to die. I hate heights, I'd tell you that. The Hours did one thing many shows can't. Making me see others for who they are, and having little fears and insecurities and many troubles, and that's why one has to be nicer to people around them.

It was nice to see everyone back in school on Wednesday: the bustling atmosphere of people talking and having fun was nice to just be in, and listen. Of course soccer played a role in making it fun 'cuz it was after a long while and I didn't play none too badly, i hope. din't really give the ball away. And finally I got a B for lit! Of all things! When you got a D for your promos you'd better hope you'd at least improve, and that was nice I guess. Thursday finally saw the end of the common tests with the history paper, which I'd admit was quite alright, French Rev was quite substantial and so probably was crisis, imperialism was so-so and source-based was a mess, but hopefully it turns out fine. I prayed about it, I know.

The funny thing was that yesterday's 'talk-with-God' session had an interesting point. My real worry walking out of that cinema that day was how to look forward to life, and what to base it on, you know, why do people go through suicides and stuff? it's so depressing, so tragic, painful, and instability sometimes grips me and I'm afraid of doing the wrong things. Yet Philippians said something about 'For me to live is Christ, to die is gain' and how people should live their life for Christ and base their foundation on Him, and particularly the writer wrote how she had to deal with the loss of her husband, or something. That parallel was just, you know, so strong, that 'coincidence', with the plight of the people in The Hours and myself sometimes. It couldn't have just been a chance thing. God's really talking to me, I hope, I think. Sigh. Nowadays the Daily Bread seems to have more messages to tell me, personally, which I think is real wonderful and a little scary too, I mean, it's just God's power that you know for something that is mass-produced it still has little snippets of real powerful information that is apt at your time and in your position to tell you something God wants to say. These few months are filled with these little personalized messages, and perhaps it's a step forward to take.

You know after the show little things strike you, you become more sensitive, and I was just recalling a song that I wrote years back, let's just say 2000, or something, the song 'Live for the end', about how we're all so trapped, and filled with pain, but then let's just live for something, for life, and it was just so apt, so cathartic, so important and real. It's amazing how songs that you write so long ago without any real meaning or thought behind it can really come back and strike you so hard with the fullness it deserves. It's scary, and it's not the first time. And all my old songs were so filled with all this stark misery and stuff, was it that pseudo-lit thing oh well, I realised my depressive streak is rather more forceful anyway.

I'm really quite apathetic today, coz maybe tomorow's back to school. Today's rather devoid of any strong emotions and has been spent on computer and history, really. can't wait to get back to school for the excitement, and the people. Yes, the people, the friends, even some of that studying. i can't believe i'm missing the teachers.

Had this really dream about cooking a meal for my future girlfriend (*coz maybe I don't have one now*), and it was some duck thing, i think, I was supposed to roast it or something and we had a discussion about how to cook it, whether to roast it to get a crispy skin as in the cookbook, or to chop it up into some delicious gastronomic delight but risk the failure of it all. I can't remember what I chose, but it was weird alright.

It's these little things, huh. Strange dream that was.

CG today was abt scheduling, which I thought was quite important, basically 'cause my life's in a limbo, all haphazard, the 2 week's break have been spent at the computer, at pool, at the guitar, etc., and on my way to cell I sort of realised that the important things are, God, music, schoolwork, friends/family, and the not-important thing would be warcraft and all that else, and doesn't one have to sort out his priorities? Interestingly enough cell was on that same topic and so maybe there's something about it, hmmz. pool was fun.
Oh well. i sorta realised that the people in cell are really true, good friends, 'cuz perhaps it was an organically formed group, and so we get along pretty well, and it's a group that can grow together and be a strong 'family' so to speak. Which is jolly nice, 'cuz everyone has a common goal, and there are common situations that we face and all that so getting together is probably easier. There's a good mix of girls and guys, of lows and highs, of stability and hysteria. great stuff.


Sigh.

you make me change so much, and I'm just so confused about who I am, do I really have to leave the garden?

All about keys:
Don't you realise that when you listen to the radio and try to play along the songs on your guitar/piano, the songs are always a little off, in slightly different frequencies? The truth of the matter is, often much of the material is not at 440Hz, defined as 'concert pitch'. Then really what is an A and what is a Bb? In fact, Handel used to tune his A to as low as 420Hz. And really, guitar songs tend to be sharper due to its sounding nicer when it's sharper, while piano songs tend to be relatively flatter, as the piano usually is a little flat due to the tuning mechanism. And really when songs are floating around in your head, there's always a definite key to that song itself. When I'm writing, there's a natural key for a certain song. It's interesting, isn't it. Since I've got bad ears, I'd take out the handphone, find the key using the 'composer', and scribble it down. Haha.
Eve Cassidy's 'Time after time' is a good song.

I'm going mad. I just had a conversation with myself, imagining myself to be a rock star being interviewed by the media. The question went something like that, 'you know, do you compare yourself to bands like Coldplay?' (I have a whole store of questions by now, actually) and I was like, 'you know, we all love to categorise bands into different categories for convenience's sake, and u know, like RHCP is funk-metal and Linkin-park is nu-metal, and Radiohead is melancholy Brit, but we're just ourselves (my band), you know we would call ourselves edgy, melodic, melancholic, you know, deep....' and I was espousing my band's principles, 'you know, every band connects with their audience in a slightly different way, and that's the important thing, when we write songs and release albums, we want every song to touch people in our way, and you know, in our albums, there's gonna be no fillers...That's our principle...even if we don't release albums for many years, so be it...'

I'm mad, like I told you.
On the lighter note, I've gotta finish writing lyrics for 'For you', and try to mug a little French Rev. Just stuffed myself on ben and jerry's, again, which means all the tennis calories are put back on again, but heck.

hey that's why debuts are always the artistes's best albums, coz maybe they've been writing for years just to get that debut out.