Today was a wonderful day! Simply joyous. though, it didn't start off very well. i got sidetracked quite a bit, and did some things which i really shouldn't have done. but soon i realised that that wasn't what God wanted me to do. i meditated on Psalms 1, and i realised that the righteous, those who love God's law, are like trees planted in streams of living water, who will bear fruit, whose leaves will not wither (they will not die), and whatever they do will prosper. i imagined myself being like that tree, and the resolution was to follow God's Word more and to obey what He has said in His Book. I shall resist the evil one. I hate the evil one because he makes me do things i don't wanna do at all. And the verse 'resist the devil and he will flee from you' is so comforting. i have nothing to fear from Satan, because I belong to Christ and Christ is stronger than the evil one in the world. i thank God for that protection. he cannot hurt me. alot of times i just allow satan to just come in and mess up my life because i am so weak and all that. so any evil i'll just allow it to come and i'll just succumb to that without resisting. now let me be stronger O Lord to discern good from bad and to put up the armour of God to protect myself from the evil one! and that means, being strong in You, O Lord, and to have wisdom to discern.

on the way down to bras basah with ben k and before that at the MRT my resolution was to have a new start. last time i'm always on this up and down. and now i decided i will live for Christ. i will not care about what music sounds good or whether certain songs are in my head or not. those things are not important. my relationship with Jesus, who died for me, is not determined by music or what music is playing in my head now and how that symbolises what state i am in in my spiritual walk--it just doesn't work that way! i will live for others, to be salt and light to others. and stop living for myself no more. i will love others. this is a chance for a fresh start. i am thankful to God for that chance.

we always say, 'love God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength'. alot of times we only know it intellectually, and how i wish i could practice it in reality! and in tecman, the bookshop, I could just feel the sweet love in my heart as I said the name of 'Jesus'--the Name of Jesus is so wonderful and sweet! I could feel how much I love Jesus. I love Him! i could feel it in my heart. and when i prayed for ben to find his book, the sensation was almost physical and so emotional, i could feel my spirit rising up inside me, in my heart, rising up to meet God's Spirit. i could feel the love in my heart, an uplifting of spirit. It wasn't just an intellectual belief in Christ (Which we all know), but it was truly manifested in an emotional and physical way. I thank God for that!! I am joyful.

i spent 30 min in QT today before that asking God to increase my love for Him. and i think that's why God helped me to open my eyes to see His love, shed on the cross for me. Tecman's great. it's so peaceful inside. God's love and presence is peace.

this post is a strong reminder that God still cares for me and that He is still for me, it's just that i have forgotten, in my weakness. so 'remind me, remind me dear Lord'.

church camp was good, by Dr David Sherbino. the location was very peaceful, the beach nice and rustic, the walkways almost foresty. a pity the older youth of my church didn't go, but there was still the younger youth for company. i thank God for all the youth, mark choo, tim teo, tim chua, tim tay, my cousin keith and kern, michelle w, jess and pam and clem, lionel etc. for company, and for my nice roommate fabian! lol. and the messages were all about drawing near to God, to build up the inner part of me. the first day was about solitude and silence, how to filter out the noise and slow down the pace of life in order for God to speak to us; the second day was about holy reading (lectio divina), which is about taking a piece of scripture, reading it, meditating on it, praying about it, contemplating what God wants to say in our lives, and to allowing us to internalise it; the third day was about prayer, saying short prayers like 'Jesus, Remember me', singing taize songs, singing the psalms, even being still before God as the Holy Spirit is interceeding to God with prayers for us. i really thank God for that opportunity for a fresh start to draw near to God. I pray that i'd be able to keep up what i've learnt and to apply it in my daily life and not let satan win the battle. i really pray that I'd be able to live up my life as a Christian.

I belong to Jesus, to God!
thank God i can live just as i want to, under His wings. no longer to be subject to a yoke of slavery!