I havent been updating for so much;
it's been more than a month.
Just want to record that I really had such a wonderful time of worship today - praising God for who He is, the loving Heavenly Father that He is who gives us all good things, and His Son Jesus Christ - the best most faithful friend you can ever find - the one who died for you, who will never leave you nor forsake you, who showers you with love and reassurance and compassion, who strengthens you. It's really great to be able to praise God again - to really mean the words of the hymn - "great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me" - and sing out with joy to the God of the universe - "great is Thy faithfulness" Lord unto me. There were moments of the Lord whispering his words of encouragement to me and his words of love as I rested in Him safe in the knowledge that like a loving shepherd he will take care of me and no harm will befall me, coz He loves me, and while I doubt sometimes being the stubborn ol' me, He proves again until I'm not doubting - for He has shown it again - and like doubting Thomas who doubted - i will remember His words that "I will never leave you nor forsake you" and the verse that sprang to my mind out of His amazing goodness to me, which was Romans 8, which said that "Nothing in heaven and earth shall be able to separate you from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Which is an amazing promise if you realise how stupid we are and how fallen we are. We think we have to love God first; no, He first loved us. Even if we don't love God (and many of us dont'r eally love God by what we do or say) He still loves us. And isn't that amazing, unconditional love.
It was amazing just praising God. Just having faith in Christ and remaining in Him and allowing Him to teach me how to worship His Father.

Psalms 103 says : " Bless the LORD, O my soul: and all that is within me, bless his holy name.

2 Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits:

3 Who forgiveth all thine iniquities; who healeth all thy diseases;

4 Who redeemeth thy life from destruction; who crowneth thee with lovingkindness and tender mercies;

5 Who satisfieth thy mouth with good things; so that thy youth is renewed like the eagle�s."

And the pastor preached on this - and so many reasons to praise God - for He is hte source of all good things, and the only reason we are saved - and the only reason we are alive - and allowed to enjoy any good thing in this world - and praise God because He is good - and He is really very very good - too good for me to see or imagine - "so good" says the Psalmist - and knows your every desire and still guides your path even though you're so wrong - knows you are fallen and still holds you in his hand - knows you are weak and still strengthens you - knows that you are lost and still guides you and promises you - forgives your sins gladly - and strengthens you with love and compassion - praise is truly saying who He is - that He is good - that He is great - that He is awesome - that there is nothing He cannot do - that he can heal all your problems should he want to - and yet chooses to give u some problems so that He can strengthen your faith - that He can do all things in your life - truly your soul cries out to the Lord and says Wow God you're so good I'm amazed and I want to say that to you today - that You are good and awesome and great - for You are!

And sometimes in my own world I question too many things - I have too many complexes - but whenever I go back to church - i realised the only thing that is keeping me there, is God. Can you imagine a life without God? I can't.